Friday, January 28, 2011

The Roller Coaster Ride is Over

Brigham passed away last night, Jan 27th, 2011 at about 11:30pm. We were blessed to have him with us for 20 days on this Earth. Like I said last time, he was taken off ECMO at 11:45am and with the help of the vent, held semi-decent oxygenation levels for a few hours. Towards the evening though, the blood gases were showing that his oxygenation levels were dropping and his carbon dioxide levels were increasing. Even though the xrays showed that his lungs were inflating, they weren't able to function as well as they needed to.

The doctors and nurses tried a few more things like tweaking vent settings and adjusting medications, but the numbers (and his condition) were not improving. We each called our parents and had them come to the hospital to see Brigham and to be there for us. By about 10:30pm, it came to the point where the doctor told us anything more they did would be doing things to him, not for him. He was not going to get better.

We made the decision to have the doctor wrap up his silo and take him off the ventilator so we could hold him. We got to snuggle with him for about 20 minutes before he passed. It was very peaceful and we have already been blessed to know that he must have bigger and better work to do on the other side. His spirit was just too big for his tiny earthly body.

We were able to spend a few hours with him afterward, doing hand and footprints, giving him a bath, doing his hair (of course), and taking a few pictures. It was a very healing, comforting, peaceful time.
Thank you again to everyone who said countless prayers on behalf of our family. We got a miracle, just not quite the miracle we were expecting. Our miracle has been the ability to accept our Heavenly Father's will and remember the Plan of Salvation. Families are forever, and Brigham is so special, the only earthly experience he needed was to come and get a body. We know we will be with Brigham again someday. He will be our sweet little boy forever.

I'll post details regarding his graveside service as soon as things are arranged. Anyone is welcome to come.

44 comments:

Mandi said...

Our prayers are with your family. What a sweet blessing having an angel amungst you for the time he was here. The bond between Eternal families is the strongest. Please let me know if you need any help. Remember love surrounds you.

Brittney said...

My heart is just breaking for you, I am so sorry. I admire your strength so much, through all of this. Our prayers are with you and your family.

Ronae said...

Your are such an inspiration of strength and faith. You are an eternal family and will see him again. You continue to amaze me and Jon and have taught me so much the past three weeks that will continue to remind me of the importance of family. Our prayers will continue to be with you and your family.

Bailey said...

I've been silently following your blog for ahile now. I felt like I was part of your family and like i KNEW Brigham. Your strong testimonies helped strengthen mine, you two are amazing examples. I will continue to keep you in my prayers.
Love
Bailey Michael

Julie and John said...

We are grateful that you have been given peace, assurance and strength. Our hearts and prayers are still with you. Thank you for your wonderful examples of faith.

Nate and Chelsea Peck said...

What a sweet angel. Our prayers are with your family. We are so blessed to have the gospel and knowledge that we have..so thankful you guys are sealed in the temple and will be able to raise your sweet little boy in the hereafter..

Karin said...

I have been crying at work this morning as I read your post - I am so sorry this has happened to you. I know your faith is strong and you will get through this stronger then you started - just remember that our loving Father in Heaven always always always has a plan and nothing happens without there being a reason. You will have prayers on both sides of that veil -

Anonymous said...

Oh Rebecca. I don't have words. I'm just sobbing at my desk at work, and I am so, so sorry. Please know that you, Justin, and Carrie are in our prayers. I'm heartbroken. I wish I could be there to help in any way. I am so, so sorry.

Jenna said...

Rebecca, I love you. You have truly inspired me through this journey. Our prayers are still with you at this difficult time.

Jenna said...

Rebecca, I love you. You have truly inspired me through this journey. Our prayers are still with you at this difficult time.

Matt and Jayna said...

You both are amazing people and are great examples to everyone around you. You truly understand our Heavenly Fathers plan and have lived it. Brigham has already made all of our lives better in his short stay on earth and there is no doubt he will do great work in heaven. Our prayers are always with your family.

Unknown said...

My heart is breaking for you. How lucky for you guys that you were able to spend the little time he had on this earth with him, and how lucky you are to have the gospel and the knowledge that you will be together again. My prayers go out to you.

Meagan said...

We love you and are thinking of you. Anything you need- I'm there for you.

Lindsey P. said...

I have been following sweet little Brigham's story. You're a strong woman my dear and I know you and your family will make it through this trial. You and your family are in my prayers.

Brittney said...

He is so beautiful!!! I am so sorry! Katie Marie is sitting here hugging me, singing to me, and wiping away my tears. I wish we could somehow comfort you, but we'll pray and pray for your family.

Richard and Allison said...

Rebecca - you don't know me but I know justin from collage. I have been reading your blog and have been praying for you guys. You are so strong and positive. I don't know what you are going through but on a small level I feel your pain. In october I miscarried which was hard but I am sure it was nothing like losing your sweet brigham who you had come to know and love. I will keep praying for you guys during this hard time.

Allison

Simpson Family said...

Oh we love you guys. What an example of faith and courage. How wonderful it is to know that you will be with Brigham again. We are praying for you and are so blessed to witness your strength.

Lynn Marble said...

Thank you for sharing this most personal experience. You have blessed so many as we were drawn closer to God and Christ as you shared Brigham's brief, earthly journey with us.... even those whom you do not know, personally. May God bless you with His strength and grace, now and forever.

Hi, I'm Katelyn! said...

I've been following your blog since you first found out about Brigham's condition. I'm a friend of Chelsey Hymas' Heavenly Father had bigger plans for Brigham. Were lucky to have the gospel and know these things. You and your husband have always seemed extremely strong, Our prayers are with you and your sweet family.

Stephanie said...

We love you so much and thank goodness for the knowledge we have--Eternal Families!!!! What a tremendous blessing!!!! Wish we were closer to be there, but please know that you are in our thoughts and prayers!! xoxoo

The Gatherers said...

There are no words, all I can say is that the Lord loves you, and Brigham has gone to serve a mission in Heaven. Your lives will be forever changed, but I know you will never have a greater experiance than that of having your sweet baby Brigham. He is truely a miracle, and I know he was so happy to come to this earth to be a part of your family, even for a short while. We will pray for you, please let me know if there is anything else I can do.

Karissa said...

Your testimony and attitude are inspiring. We have been praying for you and we will continue to pray for your family. Love you!

Karissa & Cory

Constantine said...

Hi Rebecca. This is Jocelyn Mossi (Whittington). I heard about Brigham and I wanted to come to your blog and tell you just how sorry I am. Brigham was such a beautiful little baby. Rest assured, he is in the arms of his loving heavenly Father and his Savior. I can't even begin to imagine what you are having to go through right now. The Lord is there for you to provide comfort, and of course, the power of the atonement is there also. My husband and I will be praying for you and your little family. God bless.

--Jocelyn

MaryAnne said...

Rebecca - I am so so sorry. I fell in love with your beautiful baby and cried at the news of his passing. I hope you will feel Heavenly Fathers arms around you and know how much He loves you.

Moss Family said...

What a perfect spirit Brigham is (and quite handsome)! Hang in there....your in our prayers.

MaryAnne said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Catherine and Derrick said...

Oh Rebecca I am so sorry to hear the news about Brigham. He is such a sweet boy. Your family has been in my prayers and will continue to be. I am so happy that you guys were able to spend the time with Brigham that you could what a blessing it must have been to be in the presence of a child so close to our Father in Heaven. Your faith and your strength are amazing. I am so grateful your knowledge of the gospel is giving you peace at this time. You have really helped me to relize how important my family is. May the lord bless you and your family at this time.

Amber said...

I am so sorry about Brigham. My heart aches for you and your family. I was praying for him but apparently God has bigger plans for him in Heaven. I am so inspired by your strength and courage through all of your ups and downs. Stay strong and know that you are loved. If you need anything please let me know. God Bless you and your family.

Ben & Carli said...

Dear Rebecca,
I know you probably don't remember me but I worked with you briefly at Madison Memorial Hospital a long while ago and I say this blog through another friend on facebook. I just wanted to let you know that I am so sorry for your family's loss and I love your strength and testimony through it. I am thinking about you and your family and the pictures on here are adorable.
Carli Allen

Haylee said...

I am so sorry for your loss. I don't know how to offer any comfort to you other than pray that you will find it. I want you to know that I have always admired you. You are so very talented in so many ways. I have enjoyed watching you grow into the person you are. I'm amazed at your testimony. I know that Brigham is a very special spirit. I also want you to know how special I think you are.
I wanted to share this with you---President Joseph F. Smith, the sixth President of the Church, reported: “Joseph Smith taught the doctrine that the infant child that was laid away in death would come up in the resurrection as a child; and, pointing to the mother of a lifeless child, he said to her: ‘You will have the joy, the pleasure and satisfaction of nurturing this child, after its resurrection, until it reaches the full stature of its spirit.’ …
I'm rejoicing in knowing that you will be able to nurture Brigham the way that you dreamed of here on Earth once you get to Heaven. I wish I was closer to help in some way.
I love you,
Aunt Haylee

The High Family- said...

Oh Rebecca, my heart really is aching for you. We will continue to pray for your sweet family. Much love-Cameron & Ashley High

Kels said...

You are so right! Brigham was just so special that all he needed was a body. I have been there. Just under three years ago my nephew was stillborn and the only time that only got me through was knowing that he was only here to get a body. Know that you are in my prayers!

lundgrenville said...

Im so sorry! My heart feels heavy for your family. We will continue to pray in your behalf. The Lord is on your side...Hugs to all!
The Lundgrens

The Chipmans said...

We love you guy so much and our prayers and thoughts are with you and your family.

:Brew Crew: said...

Hi Rebecca! I found your blog a couple months ago and have been an avid follower. I am so sorry to hear about Brigham. My heart is breaking for you and your family. You are such an inspiration with your courage, strength & faith. Our prayers with you.

Liana said...

I love you Rebecca! I wish so much that you didn't have to go through such heartache in your life, no mother should ever have too. I am so glad that heavenly father is giving you peace and comfort and that you had some time to hold your little angel, you and your family will continue to be in our prayers.

Skousen Family! said...

my heart is breaking for your entire family right now, I am so sorry. Our prayers are with your family,please let me know if I can do anything to help Hold tight to the gospel!
Mark and Annie Skousen

The Crebs Family said...

I am so sorry. I can't imagine what you are going through as a family right now. Our thoughts and prayers are with you all. You are so brave. What a handsome little boy.

renae said...

Dear Rebecca,
I saw your sweet mother, Lori, in Deseret Book yesterday.. Just wanted to let you know we are thinking and praying for you and your family. Brigham is such a beautiful boy! What a difficult time is must have been - and how thoughtful of you so share this precious time.
May you always keep the peace and strenght that you are feeling now, and be blessed with angels be your companions.

with love,
Renae Aston

Clark and Katie said...

Rebecca, I have been reading your posts lately, and you have been in my prayers. I ache for the difficult time you must be having, and like others admire the strength you have had through it all. You will continue to be in my prayers.

Emily said...

I don't know if Justin will remember me, we grew up in Albuquerque together, I'm his sister Alisha's age. Anyway, I just wanted to offer my condolences. Your faith is inspiring in this time and your testimony has strengthened my own--that my family is forever, and yours is too. Thank you for sharing your story with us. As I cry tears of sorrow over your loss, they turned to tears of joy for the knowledge of the plan of salvation. God be with you all right now.

Allie said...

Just wanted you to know that your sweet Brigham (as well as the rest of you) has been in my thoughts constantly. How amazing to have that knowledge that you'll be together again, and that Brigham was so special that his Heavenly Father wanted him back so soon. My prayers are with you!

The Olligschlager Family said...

I too have been a big fan of your blog. I am so sorry to hear about baby Brigham. I too admire your strength and prospective during this difficult time. Our prayers and thoughts are with you and your family.

Anne Herbert said...

Hi Rebecca, it's Anne your craft-challenged friend from Mom's Nights. I've been quietly following your blog and praying for Brigham and thinking about you and your family. You have such a gift to see the good in everything and the bigger picture. You all will continue to be in my thoughts.